June 18, 2002

Hero's welcome for returning Marines
A mother's daily routine bound to get easier as triplets' father back home.

By Jessica Peralta 
Sun Post News

Tom's a little grumpy today — bursting into tears occasionally. Matt likes to wave and stick his sliced green plastic pickle in his mouth. And Will — in one of his favorite pastimes — topples himself over and rolls his way around the living room floor.

Their mother watches, saying for them what they'd be saying if they could speak — "I just wish I could run, get around, I just wish I could!" she says for William as he bounces and squirms on the nanny's lap on this particular Friday morning in May.

Karen Hetherington, 35, of San Clemente has 10-month-old triplets. She has a 2-year-old daughter, Sarah. And her husband of five years — Alex, 34 — had been at sea since Dec. 1, when he was deployed as a Marine Cobra helicopter pilot from Camp Pendleton. Part of his mission was flying over Afghanistan. But on Monday, he returned to base along with a contingent of military men and women.

For many servicemen, the family reunion doubled as a belated Father's Day, seeing children they barely, even never, knew.

For mothers left at home, especially Hetherington, it could be a trying time raising newborns without Daddy's extra pair of hands.

"I have good days and bad days," Hetherington said of the time she spent raising her brood.

Matthew, Thomas and William were born Aug. 10, at 5 pounds, 3 ounces; 5 pounds, 10 ounces; and 5 pounds, 4 ounces, respectively — healthy weights for triplets, their mother said.

Matthew and Thomas are identical and William is fraternal. The pregnancy was tough on Hetherington. As multiple birth pregnancies are considered high-risk, she was ordered to bed rest and had the trio via C-section.

"It's mentally challenging, as well as physically," she said. But she had her husband with her.

In December he was sent out and, while it is never easy, after Sept. 11 this deployment was particularly unnerving. She had kept daily contact with him via e-mail, which she sent after her children went to sleep — a time to vent, share and send photos — eagerly awaiting his return.

A typical day for Hetherington was something like this: The baby boys start talking at about 5:30 a.m. — they "ah" and "oh" as Hetherington puts it. Mom heats up their bottles and jumps back into bed until the three start crying for food.

They feed at 6 a.m. She dresses them, changes their diapers and they play. At 7:30 a.m., Sarah wakes up and all four eat. They play in the living room with their plastic container of toys — including a plastic pizza wedge which Matt was particular fond of chewing — until about their 9 a.m. feeding, and they nap about an hour after that. They wake up, play some more, and all four eat lunch at about noon. Nap time again at 12:30 p.m. The boys sleep about an hour and Sarah about 2½. When they wake up, if it's nice out, mom and nanny take them out to blow bubbles.

On ambitious days, Hetherington said, they may even go to the park.

"Grumpy time" begins at about 5 p.m. They all eat. At 6:30 p.m., bedtime.

Hetherington said she could have never done what she does without the help of the baby sitter her church, St. Clement's Episcopal, helped her find, plus neighbors and family.

A commercial interior designer by trade, she never imagined that on a Wednesday evening last month, when she saw "About a Boy" with her mother-in-law, it would be the first time she'd set foot in a movie theater in about a year. She never thought she'd be changing 20 diapers or more a day. Never expected to be up 12 times a night when her children were all sick.

"I never ever thought this would be my life," she said with a laugh. "Ever. ... If someone told me years ago that I was gonna have triplets or four children, I would've said, "You're crazy!"

Indeed, insanity is sometimes what it's like for Hetherington. But the love in her eyes as she sits and plays with her children, rocking one of them on her lap, is unmistakable.

Jo Shoop, 85, one of Hetherington's neighbors who helps out with the children, said even though Hetherington has her hands full, she has nothing but patience.

"She doesn't show any partiality or anything," Shoop said. "She's just a wonderful mother."

And now, it's Daddy's turn.